Three years ago, I was raped by one of our neighbour’s brothers. It was the first time for me. I felt very bad but I didn’t tell anyone because I didn’t want the matter to go beyond the two of us. On that day, I had gone into the bathroom in the afternoon when the whole compound was empty to take my bath. I didn’t know he was at home. The next thing I knew was someone forcing his way into the bathroom when I had soap on my face. He overpowered me and had his way with me.
Although he later apologized but the harm had been done. My virginity was gone. As a result of the incident, the man I was going to marry left me to marry another woman.
It was painful but I surrendered everything to God. My parents were very disappointed; there was nothing they didn’t say; my ex branded me a woman of easy virtue.
Although the boy relocated the day after the incident, I left a week after to stay with a friend of mine. From there I picked up the pieces of my life again. I was lucky to get a very good job but my heart refused to heal.
Another man I dated also disappointed me and at the point I was contemplating staying off men, the man who raped him came knocking on my door.
From the look of him, he was doing very well. I thought he missed his way and was about closing the door against him when he said he came to apologise for what he did to me on that day.
Don’t minding if we had an audience, he went on his knees to beg me right in front of my door. I had no choice but to allow him come in. he said he hadn’t had peace of mind since the incident.
Despite telling him that I have forgiven him, he and his family members want us to get married. he said it is the only way I can show my forgiveness for him. He has been disturbing me since January this year, begging and asking me to marry him.
Between you and I; I have fallen in love with him but just don’t know how to forgive him for what he did to me three years ago.
Please help me understand what I should do and how to go about this situation.